Sunday, August 17, 2008
God's healing process: Day 2
day 2.. woke up.. super early.. since i slept at 1am.. and woke up at 8.30.. it is early okay! (:
anyways.. first lesson.. while i was doing my devotion in the morning and then writing an email to carol..
first lesson of day 2: willingness
how willing am i to let God change me?... during devotion.. this was what i read and learnt.. more than often.. i just said.. 'okay, im going to change' but i dont see myself really changed.. then i asked myself why... the answer came.. of course.. because we are still not willing to let God change us.. we are willing to change.. but are we willing to change the way God wants us to be.. that is another story.. then i realise.. more than often, we see that we are depressed.. sad.. upset about some things... God could have set us free when we asked for it.. but when we asked for it.. why is it that sometimes, we still feel the unhappiness...
i was stunned at this question.. at first.. then God opened up my understanding.. and said.. the setting free begins when we exchange it with the things that was making us sad and hurt.. if we do not surrender.. how is God going to set us free from it?...
then after that i thought to myself.. experiencing this for the past 2 plus years.. i have come to realised.. how difficult it is to surrender to Him.. how often, have i told God.. God i surrender my emotions towards this someone to you.. then few days later.. i was back to square one.. why.. i asked God why.. He gently pointed me back to the first point.. willingness..
are we willing to surrender and let go.. truly.. i was speechless.. then He asked me.. 'do you love me enough to trust me' 'do you love me enough to allow me to heal you of your hurt'... 'by mouth, you could say that you want Me to heal you.. but are you willing to let me heal you.. or do you still want to hold on to it?...
i thought long about it... and im still thinking about it.. because i do not want this just to be another empty big talk or promise to Him.. i really want to be serious about it.. so this day..
Dubai time: 12.30pm
God spoke again...
lesson 2: There is always a reason to be thankful to God about
as i was just walking in ikea with my parents.. i was listening to my mp3.. and the song that was playing was 'This is the day' by Hillsong Kids..
I see all that You've given to me
I just got to praise
I sing cause Jesus is living in me
And I´m so amazed!
Your love gave me a way to freedom
Now I walk in the light
You're all
All that my heart is seeking
Cause You´re great in my life
This is the day
My God has made
I've got a reason to celebrate
To jump up and down
And spin all around
To shouted hey!
This is the day!
It doesn't matter what I face
It doesn't matter what comes my way
I know that You care for me
So it's all right
Yes, so it's all right!
it never fails to let me see that God is the reason for life..
It doesnt matter what i face.. it doesnt matter what comes my way..
i know that God care for me... these three lines.. seems 'normal' but powerful...
whatever that comes my way.. God cares for me..
last lesson of the day: this would be a process...
somehow.. i guess God knew that i wanted to get over this really quickly... but He reminded me, that this is a process.. this is the beginning of many lessons to comes.. this is the beginning of maturing into another stage.. this is the beginning of learning things that i have never learnt before.. i am always impatient.. forever wanting things to be done quickly... but i really believe that God is really training my patience... i really stink at waiting.. be it waiting for people.. waiting for the bus.. waiting for the train.. waiting for anything and everything.. within 10mins i get really impatient...
this process would take months.. and even years.. i believe... it is not going to be easy.. any step of the process that i fail.. i really dunno what will happen.. but nonetheless, i would say that i would try my best to keep to the process that God has already planned for me.. not deterring any step..
the power of His love.. and His mercy over my life... i am just really grateful for Him...
end of day 2.. looking forward to day 3..
violetjoy signing off~
4:11 PM
